stream of unconciousness

exam week next week!

this is about the time i start kicking myself for not studying ‘this hard’ throughout the sem.  surprisingly though, wala pa, maybe tomorrow.

any of you guys ever  been there? 

whenever i sit down and think about it, i always wind up rationalizing my sloth.  i always come to the conclusion that i just wouldn’t be me if this wasn’t the situation i was in (having to make up for the sem that is). 

You think there are just some things you can’t change no matter how hard you try? 

it might sound depressing, but it kind of gives me hope. the fact that there are just some things that are meant to happen, or persons we are just meant to be - gives me hope that there IS some higher power with a plan.

I figger it’s like us being pieces on a chessboard.  bishops only move diagonal, pawns one box forward at a time (and eat diagonal), rooks only in straight lines…  in the same way i think lahat tayo may sariling diskarte.  inequity?  nah, i don’t think so, all the pieces have an opportunity to mate the other king (that sounded queer), it’s just HOW they make use of how they move that determines their success. 

Everybody can’t be the queen- who moves any way she wants and can pass as many squares as physics may allow.  But who would WANT to be a queen?  think about it, what does your opponent gun for the most?  The queen!  What are you most afraid of letting out too early in the game coz she’ll become a target?  The queen!  my point is, be careful what you wish for, because being the queen  isn’t always be the most comfortable position to be in.

(I’d personally like to be the horse (knight, whatever).  talk about cool, the mofo can JUMP OVER pieces, come out of nowhere and capture an unsuspecting piece, plus its the least predictable.  so cool tsongparetoldude….yah, the pawn has the most potential, since it can be queened, but the game’d be almost over by then, where’s the fun in that??… a lot like buying a porche when you’re 80)

ofcourse, there’s always the ‘our shortcomings are there to keep us dynamic and continuously progressing’ apprpoach….

anyway,

Back to exam week, wish me luck, i’ll need it.  nothing incredibly new for me though, i’ve been in similar positions throughout my life…. 

i’m hoping one day i’ll thank God i’ve had so much experience in cramming.  it might end up saving the world.  like maybe i’ll be kidnapped by crazy aliens who deny me sleep for three days, while keeping me in their laser-barred dungeon.  Where i escape just in time to witness the Alien Leader disposing of his encoded password to abort the "earth-bomb’ in a trashcan.  Which i pick up and sleepily decipher just in time to save the world from annihilation.  Then i’ll be king of the world, and laker girls will be chanting ‘he’s the king!  he’s the king!’ while i’m slowly beamed down by the alien ship, and the foo fighters’ "hero"’d be playing in the background…

sigh….until that day…i shall keep fighting the good fight, and i guess NOT give up trying to change my study habits (maybe the only way i can maintain who i am would be to keep trying to change)

….maybe next sem will be better…

(i’m not making sense i know, but thanks for reading anyway)

This entry was posted on Saturday, October 1st, 2005 at 11:30 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.